I got this today from my favorite Canadian, Miss Sarah. Enjoy!
If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their
tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were
growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school
every morning ... uphill BOTH ways ...yadda, yadda, yadda.
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there
was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like
that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got
it! But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't
help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got
it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a
damn Utopia!
And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good
you've got it! I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The
Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the
damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!
There was no email! ! We had to actually write somebody a
letter ...with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across
the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a
week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music,
you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift
it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it
off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning
and @#*% it all up!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on
the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal,
that's it! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either!
When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was!
It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie,
your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!!
You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With
games like "Space Invaders" and "asteroids" and the graphics
sucked ass! Your guy was a little square! You actually had
to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or
screens, it was just one screen forever! And youcould never
win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster
and faster until you died!
Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as
stadium seating! All the seats were the same height!
If a tall guy or some old broad with a hat sat in front of
you and you couldn't see, you were just screwed!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only
like 15 channels and there was no onscreen menu and no
remote control! You had to use alittle book called a TV Guide
to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to
channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over
to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network
either!
You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear
what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALLWEEK for cartoons, you
spoiled little rat-bastards!
And we didn't have microwaves! If we wanted to heat something
up we had to use the stove or go build a frigging fire ...
imagine that! If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid
Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got
it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five
minutes back in 1980!
Regards,
The Over 30 Crowd
Also, a birthday shout-out to southern California!
It's Amy Wood's birthday!
Happy Birthday, girl!
Now get out there and party like a rock star!
A Slow Cooker Thanksgiving
4 weeks ago
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